I Was A Southern Belle For A Weekend in Kentucky
Kentucky...what a place to catch me by surprise. My step - dad grew up in Kentucky and so did all his family, who is now my family and some of my favorite people on planet earth,anyways...he went to a high school with 30 kids in the whole school, they had 50 pet snakes, a pet skunk and hung out at a swimming pond called the "n*gger hole". So my perceptions of Kentucky was it is a hick place where hill billies with no teeth do meth. I was extremely wrong. Kentucky is god's gift to America with rolling green farm land fields that luxury race horses graze on basking their shiny coats in sunlight, just absorbing the southern happiness.
This place captured my heart. My dream of my farm estate with my monogrammed initials on the gates was alive and thriving here. A horse farm in Lexington ranges from 3-10 million dollars. The horses on these properties are like 1 million each. A quart of the horse's jizz is like 5 million. So next time you want to talk about how people in the south are like redneck hillbillies in trailer parks, do some field research.
Lexington = money
Lexington = hott preppy guys in polos and cowboy boots driving big trucks.
Lexington = old men in yellow suits and top hats drinking fine bourbon while they show off their million dollar horses.
My cousin Brady recently moved to Lexington, KY to attend the University of Kentucky and is double majoring in Bio and Chemistry (smarty pants). He has his own apartment, which in typical Natalie & Kelsey style we took over with all our clothes and makeup.
Kelsey and I left for Kentucky at 8:30pm on Thursday. Its a 3 hour drive with a 1 hour time change...which caught us by surprise because we had no idea Kentucky was in the eastern time zone. We arrived in Lexington at 1AM. We weren't in the house for longer than 2 minutes before we decided we were going to a bar to party.
We hit the local college bar downtown, which is always fun for Kelsey and I because we cut our college experiences short and also just college in the south is different. There was an ambulance outside the bar because someone got pepper sprayed. As we walked in a blacked out girl stumbled out and dropped her nachos all over the ground. The coolest part was that there was a $10 cover, then it was all you can drink inside. I REPEAT $10=UNLIMITED DRINKS....and they were not weak. I asked the bar tender for a jack and coke.... he said, "We only have bourbon" I responded, "Sorry, I forgot where I was for a second."
After getting our fair share of the unlimited drinks, we headed home to let out our aggression playing Grand Theft Auto. The game was centered in LA and we realized how happy we were to be in the south and out of Los Angeles. I don't know why Los Angeles literally just grosses us out and I feel like if I went there I would throw holy water on everyone or catch a disease walking down Hollywood Blvd.
I fell asleep to Kelsey pistol whipping hookers outside a hospital on La Cienga.
The next morning we went to brunch and googled mansions so we could find pretty roads to drive around. We had a long day ahead of us because we were driving an hour and a half back towards Nashville to attend the Luke Bryan concert. Even with a packed schedule we still had time for a country road inspired photo shoot.
So as much as I was saying Kentucky is classy...Brady still has a confederate flag in his room and all his camo gear in his closet, which made for an opportune redneck parody photoshoot and some twerking to Dixieland Delight.
After getting our pre game on we drove to Elizabethtown, KY to meet up with Lauren for the Luke Bryan concert. The concert was literally in the middle of a corn field, and this cornfield was in the middle of no where. Naturally we were late, so we shotgunned some beers and headed in. The concert was the size of a festival, like HUGE. We def turned this corn field into a party.
Luke Bryan is super sexy. Dream man. His voice is hot. He deer hunts and drinks whiskey. Literally manifesting a guy like Luke Bryan for myself. He broke his collar bone and was in an arm cast, but was still hip thrusting and getting down and dirty. So were we. I literally cried twice. We shook it for the young bucks sitting in the honky tonks. We shook it for the birds and the bees. We shook it for the squirrels. We shook it for the catfish way down deep in the creek. I was going so hard with my dance moves that I fell and multiple people caught me....but were in the south where people are nice so they were chill about it. This guy came out of the crowd and told us he had gotten his heart broken that night. Kelsey told him, "It hurts now but will feel better later" and we all embraced in a group hug. I'm really surprised we didn't loose our voices. Country concerts are all good vibes. My only complaint is they only had Miller lite and Smirnoff Ice, like no one likes those drinks. GET IT TOGETHER SPONSORS I WAS IN THE MOOD FOR SHOTS.
So in summary, that was the most southern day ever. Woke up, ate biscuits, drove through some farms, put on my American flag shirt and camo hat, drove to a corn field for a country concert, shot gunned beers, and cried to Luke Bryan singing.
The next day was KENTUCKY AF #LIT #FAM #LOL. Brady asked us what we wanted to do and I said party. Little did I know it was about to the best day of my life at the Keeneland Racetracks. We woke up and headed to his friends house or breakfast. His friend Brandon was jamming out to 80s hard rock while cooking on all 4 stoves, spicey gravy, regular gravy, biscuits and hash browns. The whole squad was over there pre gaming with 12 bottles of champagne. We murdered those bottles, then switched to shots to get as Kelsey would say, "our initial buzz" on. The guys put on their polos, blazers and loafers and we were off to the horse races for the day.
So ya, I don't know why the horse races were seriously the best day of my life, I think my internal happiness was just radiating out and made it so. This weekend in Kentucky made me realize that I was really living my truth and my truth is the south. I'm sorry there is no going back to California for me. I love guys in polos who drive trucks and call me sweetheart. I love drinking bourbon at horse races. I love country concerts in corn fields. I love wearing American flag clothes in October. I love eating biscuits and gravy. Kentucky was lit.